Welcoming Newcomers by Seeing Through the Eyes of an Outsider

Instructor’s Guide

 

Evangelism Resources
USA/Canada Mission/Evangelism Department
International Church of the Nazarene
© 2001 Evangelism Resources
USA/Canada Mission/Evangelism Department
International Church of the Nazarene

All Rights Reserved

 

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Director of Course Development Dr. Lyle Pointer

Author of Module Rev. Scott Rainey

Curriculum Developer Rev. Scott Rainey

Permission is granted to copy this material for local church training. No part of this material may be copied, photocopied, or reproduced in any form for the purposes of sale.

I. Introduction.

Colossians 4:5
Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity.
1 Thessalonians 4:11-12
Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.
Hebrews 13:2
Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it.

Have you ever thought about the fact that the world is watching Christians? They want to see how we treat each other, how we treat the stranger, and how we treat the broken and hurting. In a very real way they want to find us faithful. They want us to prove true. They want to believe God is real, people can know Him, and He can change their lives. More often than not, we let the world down.

Have you ever thought about what the outsider sees when they come to our church?

Research has shown that the reasons for declining church attendance are as follows:
1. Sermons are boring and don’t relate to everyday life
2. Church members are unfriendly to visitors
3. Churches offer very little for children and youth
4. Churches are only interested in my money

The purpose of this module is to challenge us, the church, to take an honest look at ourselves to see if we are “being wise toward outsiders.”

The objectives for this module are:
• To remind ourselves that we are the body of Christ.
• To sharpen our character and prepare for visitors in the church!

II. Lesson.

A. Let’s examine the four primary questions the world is asking about church people…

1. Are the people of the church genuine and sincere?
2. Is the church relevant to my daily life?
3. Are the church and its people warm and inviting?
4. Is the church a safe place for my family and me?

B. Are the people of the church genuine and sincere?

1. We Must Love One Another.

John 13:35

By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.

a. Love for one another is the mark of all true disciples.
b. The world will notice whether or not the people of the church truly love each other.
c. Love for one another will attract the world to the church.

Illustration:

Michael and Amy drove by the intersection everyday. The Church of the Nazarene on the corner was often busy with activity. From a teen car wash to an all-church workday, there were always representatives of the church on the grounds.

To Michael and Amy, that is what the people of the church were – representatives. How did they treat one another? Did they look happy? Did they truly love one another? After months of watching from the outside, Michael and Amy visited the church. Their words to the greeter at the door were simple, “You passed the test,” they said. “You all truly do care for each other. We have seen it with our own eyes.”

2. Outsiders want friendship with no strings attached.

Acts 2:47

[The believers spent their time] praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

a. The attraction of the early church was that they enjoyed fellowship together.
b. Their love and friendship for one another was one of the elements that led to an increase in those being saved.
c. This is a friendship with no strings attached.
d. Outsiders want to be viewed as people, not projects.

3. Outsiders want to experience God, not dry ritual.

a. Outsiders want to experience God, not just know about Him.
b. This does not mean that all ritual is dry. However, if a ritual of the church is empty and does not convey the presence of God, outsiders will be the first to notice.
c. Does our church have a passionate spirituality?

Illustration:

Linda, a single, unchurched professional, lived next door to Tim and Marcia, a young Christian couple. Linda graduated from college in a small town and moved to the city. Her relationships were few because of her recent move, so Tim, Marcia, and Linda became friends.

Tim and Marcia were planning a home Bible study, and the date for its start quickly approached. They invited Linda, and she accepted. After six weeks of the Bible study, Linda stopped Tim and Marcia one evening to comment, “I had no idea there were people my age who really loved God and followed Him during the week. I always thought it was simply a religion to be followed on Sundays.” Linda saw a passionate spirituality in her new friends which eventually led her to Christ.

4. Our congregation must care for the real needs of people.

Matthew 25:35
For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in.

a. A Christian congregation must meet the needs of the disenfranchised in our world.
b. Meeting the needs of the weak is the same as meeting the needs of Jesus.
c. The unchurched are willing to follow a cause rather than a denomination. This is why many physical needs are met outside of the church today.

Illustration:

Aaron and Missy were recently married when a house fire destroyed nearly all they owned. They were unchurched. But because of the emotions this incident brought, they decided to attend a local Nazarene church. When the congregation found out about the incident, $200 was raised to give some support to the couple.

C. Is the church relevant to my daily life?

1. Pastors and Sunday school teachers must preach sermons that touch the lives and feelings of people.

a. Sermons and Sunday school lessons must stay true to the Scripture from which they speak.
b. Scripture is amazingly relevant to the lives of people.
c. Pastors and Sunday school teachers must work hard at the task of bringing the passage, written 2000 years ago to a group of people half way around the world, to a contemporary understanding for people in their congregation.

2. We must avoid having rules without reason.

a. Scripture, as God’s love letter to mankind, gives guidelines to godly living.
b. These guidelines are based on love from God.
c. Outsiders are not against guidelines for Christian living, but are against rules with no reasons behind them.

3. We must work to bridge the cultural gap.

a. Our world is becoming more and more secular. The church, in many ways, has a culture that is all its own. Because of this, the individual who is void of a church background may be left unable to hear and understand the Gospel message even if he/she wanted to.
b. We cannot compromise our “non-negotiables,” but for the sake of the Gospel being heard, we must make our negotiables relevant to the world in which we live.
c. What are some of these negotiables?

1. Language

1 Corinthians 14:16-17
With regard to the debate about speaking in tongues, Paul encouraged the church in the following way:

If you are praising God with your spirit, how can one who finds himself among those who do not understand say "Amen" to your thanksgiving, since he does not know what you are saying? You may be giving thanks well enough, but the other man is not edified.

a. The context of this passage is regarding unknown tongues.
b. Our language is to be understandable to all.

2. Dress
? Is the way we dress on Sundays a negotiable?
? Does our dress fit the culture in which the church finds itself?
3. Music
? Is the style of music we sing a negotiable?
? What does our choice of music preference say to the outsider?
4. Methods of communication (creative arts, worship, drama,
media)
? Is the style of learning a negotiable?
? In a day when visual learning is used more than lecture and
reading, can the church adapt through drama, media, and
creative worship arts?

D. Is the church warm and inviting?

1. We must work to make our building more aesthetically appealing to the outsider.
a. How is the landscaping?
b. Is the building clean?
c. Does the building appear current?
d. Is the building handicap accessible?

2. Our congregation must be friendly and open to outsiders.

Titus 1:8
Describing an elder…
Rather he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined.

a. Biblical hospitality is the call for the church to care for the stranger.
b. Elders and laypersons alike are to be providing hospitality to all who enter the church doors.

E. Is the church a safe place for my family and me?

1. Are outsiders free to ask questions?
2. Is the environment safe and productive for the children or youth of outsiders?

Illustration:

Martha, a single mom of a four-year old, visited a local Nazarene church one Sunday. Before the service began, a greeter took her to the door of her child’s Sunday school classroom. The teacher met her at the door and asked, “How old is your daughter?”

Martha responded, “Four.”

“Oh,” the teacher said, “we changed classrooms last week. This is the five-year olds. Four-year olds go to the room down the hall.”

When Martha arrived, she was met again by a teacher. “How old is your daughter?”

“Four. We just came from the five-year old room. The teacher there said, my daughter was to come here.”

“When does your daughter turn five, because that is what really breaks down our classrooms?”

In frustration, Martha, feeling as though she and her daughter were not wanted in either class, took her daughter with her to the service and never returned.

3. Are outsiders allowed to move at their own pace along their spiritual journey?

F. There are some signs that we might notice when our church is “hitting the mark” with outsiders:
1. Writing a kind message on a welcome card for the first time
2. Inquiring about church membership classes
3. Questioning the church’s teaching and history
4. Asking for further information
5. Asking questions about the message
6. Bringing a guest for the first time
7. Requesting prayer for themselves or others
8. Getting involved in a small group
9. Enrolling in their first Bible study
10. Asking to be baptized
11. Giving their first offering
12. Volunteering for a ministry task
13. Offering an idea for ministry

III. Small Group Work.

Break into groups of four or five and answer the following questions.

1. What was it about the Sunday school class or church you visited that made you feel welcomed and relaxed?

2. What bothered you and made you uncomfortable?

3. What caught your attention in either a positive or negative sense?

4. What are the non-negotiables for our church? What things must remain the same to keep the Gospel honest and clear? Then, what things are negotiable? What can we change in the church to help the unchurched feel more at home?
Examples to discuss:
a. Language (using “churchy” words)
b. Dress (formal or casual)
c. Music (styles)
d. Styles of learning (creative arts, drama, media)

IV. Module Wrap-Up.

This section provides an opportunity to close the module.

• Ask participants from each small group to share the findings from their discussions.
• Encourage the participants to continue to dialogue about these important issues of seeing through the eyes of an outsider.
• Answer any questions and provide encouragement.